Thursday, July 10, 2008

Oh Shit (literally)

One of my roomates had a birthday this week, so I made a Rubik's Cube cake. The cake on looked really neat and I couldn't help but give it a go. It's a pretty good set of instructions, but what they fail to mention is that you need to be SOME KIND OF CHEF EXTRAORDINAIRE to make the fondant.

I've only ever made 4 cakes in my life (on mah own), and each one of them was more or less a success. Two of them were made from scratch. Naturally, it was about time for an epic fail.

On the plus side, I only lit the oven on fire once, and the cake tasted great even though it looked like a mouldy poison mushroom from Super Mario Bros. (the lost levels, of course). It was really neat, the smoke actually rose out of the oven and started coming through the burners, just like a cartoon or something! I had always thought that it was just a bit of dramatic exaggeration, but no, apparently oven fires really do that.

Lighting an oven on fire is only really a fail in my books. What made it an EPIC fail is this:
Food colouring.
What's so bad about food colouring, you ask? Well, nothing, in the right quantities... but I decided that I wanted a REALLY BRIGHT Rubik's cube. No problems, so far. Everyone takes a different coloured mini-cube and eats it.

Fast forward to the next day.

Scene: Birthday boy and couch man are sitting on the couch. I walk in the door, home from a long day of work.

Me: Have you pooped today?
Birthday Boy (BB): *pained expression* Yes.
Me: I'm ... so ... sorry ... What colour did you eat?
BB: Green.
Me: Oh dear, that's disturbing.
BB: Very. I thought I was dying.
Me: At least you didn't eat neon blue.
BB: Ick.

So apparently... if you eat enough food colouring... It DYES YOUR POOP TOO. And I don't just mean tinge of blue, I mean I HAD SOLIDLY NEON BLUE POOPS THAT DYED THE TOILET BOWL BLUE. Now that I've shared that, I'm going to go.

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