More people on the train

I saw Hercule Poirot on the train today. Seriously. The only thing missing was a French accent (or Belgian). Instead it was Hercule Poirot with an Australian accent, which was almost bizarre. He had a waxed moustache and a lot of hair gel (pomade?) that made his hairstyle look really... ummm.. old? Antiquated? Out of place? Also, he was wearing a meticulously clean suit, and he swept off the surface of the seat before sitting down. I'm just waiting for an unsolvable mystery to show up in the paper, and then summarily get solved by a visiting foreign super-detective.